Day 55-57 - The Wheels Come Off, Time To Count, and Easier Said Than Done

Though my weekly weigh-in does not yet reflect it, I comfortably slipped into my old routine this past weekend. Sweets, salty snacks, gin and juice, late nights, and a sedentary session that left my legs feeling atrophied. Much fun was had by all, but after the dust settled and all of our guests had shuffled off into the darkness, I was left feeling very disappointed. What was fun at the time proved to be physically and mentally detrimental, and though I knew all along that it wasn't a good idea, I still followed through on any and all temptations. Three days of zero physical activity, paired up with the return of some reprehensible eating habits, has led to a fatigued, unhappy, and slightly bloated individual. And now the most difficult part of this whole situation seems to be getting back up, dusting myself off, and continuing with my plan. It's far too easy to just accept defeat for the umpteenth time and continue this vicious cycle. Writing this journal is specifically geared to cope with situations like this. Stepping back from the situation, I could see myself easily settling into my old ways for the next few weeks, until the next brilliant revelation. But maybe this time the revelation wouldn't hit me for a few months instead. That could very well leave me gasping for breath and clutching my chest as I vault up the stairs to answer the phone. Setbacks are an inevitable part of this process. A failed test of will should not mark the end of the road, but rather initiate a new beginning. A chance to prove that I'm strong enough to handle these lapses by following it up with a renewed desire to better myself. But if I don't put forth the effort, I've relinquished my right to complain. Easier said than done.

3500 calories a week. 500 per day. The difference between gaining a pound of fat and losing one. I haven't been counting my calorie intake, but I think now would be as good a time as any to start. By my calculations, I'll need between 1600-1800 calories per day. When you bring it down to the basics, weight control is an issue of mathematics. I've mentioned it before, but the formula is simple. Expend more calories than you take in. Again, easier said than done.

I could go into great detail about every little thing I did wrong this past weekend, but I don't want to dwell on it. It was an addiction-packed, sugar-fueled set of days that I won't be repeating any time soon. I may be short on words today, as this entry has served as more of a confessional than an inspiration, but I'm here to prove that I'm not going to let a few days of failure derail me from my objective. I will let my actions speak for themselves. I'm willing to learn from my mistakes, not be discouraged by them, but that, once again, is easier said than done. Who said this was going to be easy?